In America, the word “mother” is nearly always describing white motherhood. That’s what Nefertiti, a single African American woman and the author of “Motherhood So White,” discovered when she decided she wanted to adopt a Black baby boy out of the foster care system. Nefertiti was shocked by the assumptions people had about what adoption, motherhood, and Black motherhood should look like. She realized that American society saw motherhood through a white lens, and that there would be no easy understanding or acceptance of the kind of family she hoped to build.
We’re hosting FREE community gatherings for working parents every month. Come gather with other parents and soon-to-be-parents to meet each other and connect. Come as you are, show up in your jammies, with your baby, nursing, hiding in the bathroom, ducking into a car for a meeting—whatever you need to do, by all means. Sounds, noises, messes all welcome.
In a year with a pandemic, wildfires, the death of Ruth Bader Ginsburg, and more, it can be easy to fall into despair, sadness, or anger. Even if you’re reading this years from now, things can go wrong—and they often do. People pass on, projects go under, businesses are forced to change. Part of the work of being human is reconciling with all that is beyond our control. Here’s a practical exercise to understand what’s within your control, and how to use it.
School is back in session, and parents everywhere are fatigued, overwhelmed, and still in the lurch. Workplaces are less and less forgiving, and yet the problems created by the pandemic are still here. What’s a working parent to do? Last week, Lions + Tigers gathered a panel to talk about specific steps parents can take to strategically plan ahead for the coming year. I hosted a conversation with Brea Starmer, founder of Lions+Tigers, Shauna Causey of Weekdays, and Blessing Adesiyan of Mother Honestly.
If you’re overwhelmed by everything, you’re not alone. There’s a lot happening right now. All of the things happening right now—a pandemic, job stress, health worries, lack of childcare, natural disasters, uncertainty about the future, an election year—can conspire to take a toll on our mental health. The environments we are in and the way the stress affects us is real. If you’re feeling stressed and close to burnout, you’re not alone. This is a struggle, and I’ve got a few tips for you to stay compassionate to yourself and help make all this stress just a little bit lighter.
Are you curious about starting a podcast, or in the process of starting one? I get dozens of questions about starting a podcast, so grab your headphones and listen to this episode. I’ll cover the tools I use, the way I structure the audio, content guidelines, and vocal tips.
A few years ago, when we first had children, my husband talked to his workplace about parental leave. He knew that while he’d like to be home during the first few weeks during and after the birth, he was also interested in being able to be around with his kids while they grew up. So, the summer after our first kid was born, he shifted his schedule to work from 8am to 4pm. From there, he advocated for taking a four-week leave every summer to spend time with his kids. We’re not taking a full sabbatical this year because of the pandemic, but we will still push pause on a few things where we can.
Sometimes it takes a while for motherhood to grow on you—it’s not always instant or immediate. For Shama Hyder, she didn’t love the baby stage right away, and wondered if there was a “motherhood gene” she might be missing. Here’s her story of loving her business and adjusting to a new baby, and how long it really took for her to find her rhythm.
When coronavirus first happened, many of us were adjusting to figuring out the shut down. How long would it last? Would this just be a week or two? What were the next steps? For many of you reading this blog and listening to the podcast, you have also been trying to figure out your birth plans. How do you give birth in a pandemic? What do you plan for, when everything keeps changing? Here’s what Megan Hale did when she found out her husband and mother both tested positive for the flu the week before she was due to give birth.
A few weeks ago, Tara McMullin invited me onto her podcast to talk at length about mastermind programs—how we run them, what we charge, how they’re organized, how many people are in them, and more. I asked her if I could share the episode with all of you, too, so I’m airing this conversation again on the Startup Pregnant podcast. This episode is a very detailed, behind-the-scenes look at both of our online programs and how we’ve designed our mastermind communities.
Kelsey Kerslake runs a design agency as well as a coaching business, and has a young kiddo at home who just turned one. Her husband is an essential worker, so she hasn’t had a minute of childcare or backup help throughout all of this. Here’s how she is rescheduling her days and dealing with the coronavirus pandemic. Her question—can she keep working on a reduced schedule and still have the same impact?
Think of a difficult conversation that you are in the middle of, or one that you’ve recently had. Maybe it’s onboarding a new team member, or working with a client. Maybe it’s with your partner or your spouse, and you’re trying to negotiate all those logistics of parenting. Maybe it’s with the grandparents, your kids, your boss, a colleague—whoever it is, I am sure that you have had the experience of how challenging it can be to go through a hard conversation. Today on the podcast, we get to have Sharon Stolt join us to teach us what to do and how to start the art of having challenging and uncomfortable conversations.
You all have been asking to hear how other moms and small business owners are navigating the pandemic right now. I’ve been interviewing working parents about how they’ve been affected by the pandemic. Today we take a look at Caitlin Boland Aarab: she and her husband are both attorneys, and they own their own law firm in Great Falls, Montana. They have two kids at home and she’s pregnant with their third kid. When everything shut down, the kids were sent home from school—but the courts weren’t closed. Work was still in session.
I’ve given my three year old my laptop to reply to your incoming emails right now. My one-year old might also be chiming in. I’m having a hard time keeping them away from the keyboard. Don’t worry, I’ve invented a magical device that can also translate their thoughts and actions into words. As of Sunday, they are now responsible for my inbox. You can consider them my new personal assistant.
My friend has an almost-two-year old and she asked me “So when do I need to think about potty training?” Yeah, as though you needed anything else to consider in the pandemic. Well, I took a few minutes to brain dump everything I remembered about potty training in a quick dash Voxer message to her, all while doing dishes and cleaning up the boys’ room in our house. We both thought that these might be useful memos for you, especially if you happen to be in a similar situation. Consider this an unofficial, scrappy overview of Potty Training that will help you do a good enough job … for now.
JOIN THOUSANDS OF PARENTS
WHO WANT TO RETHINK "HOW IT'S ALWAYS BEEN"
A deep-dive podcast with transformative conversations at the heart of working, parenting, and better living. Sign up below.