The Invisible Emotional Weight of Infertility – Episode #026 With Anne

The possibility of infertility

Do you want to be a mother? And when were you first asked this question? For Anne, it was at the age of six. And so much of a woman’s identity is tied up in her answer to this question.

Anne wasn’t sure how to answer the motherhood question until she met her husband. The answer then became a resounding yes. She wanted to have a family with this man. So they started trying a year and a half ago …

Infertility can’t always be explained

But after seeing the doctor for preliminary tests, Anne learned that she wasn’t ovulating. She was diagnosed with unexplained infertility. Now she finds herself stuck between hope and full mourning. She is always carrying the invisible emotional weight that comes with not knowing what the future holds.

Today Anne bravely shares her fertility journey with us. She explains the difficult conversations surrounding her diagnosis and how the experience has impacted her business. I ask her what she wishes she had known as a young woman and how she approaches the uncertainty. Listen in for Anne’s insight around initiating conversations about infertility. She also walks us through taking charge of your physical and financial health. Furthermore, she also dives into the mental discipline required to keep hoping for the best.

The Startup Pregnant Podcast Episode #026

Some quotes from the episode

• “It’s amazing how deep you can sink in about a year and a half’s time. We feel like we’ve been trying to have a baby for ten years.”
• “You get this diagnosis that’s unexplained infertility, and that will be the diagnosis until they stumble upon an actual mechanical reason, so to speak, that your body doesn’t function.”
• “We’re considering different alternatives to natural conception, but I have a lot of doubts about that.”
• “That’s another hard decision to make: Do you decide that you’ll do anything that you need to do? Furthermore, do you actually say, ‘Well, okay, nature has decided this for me, and I’m going to accept it.’”
• “The conversations you have with people around infertility are very similar to those you have when people have a serious illness. People will want to give you advice, and people will have opinions.”
• “It takes such discipline to keep hoping for the best outcome and to keep yourself from not falling apart.”
• “Discipline is a mental resource that you have that’s finite … and I find it really challenging to wake up every morning and to know that you’re going to have to schlep yourself through the day.”
• “How can we build a meaningful life together if we don’t have that family aspect? You’re going to have to find that purpose elsewhere.”
• “Getting your financial health in order to face these things is really important. You have to protect yourself, your ability to make an income, your ability to finance your dreams, and to finance—unfortunately—little disasters, little thunderclouds like these, if you’re not strong about your financial health … then you’re going to regret it later.”

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EPISODE SPONSOR & SPECIAL OFFER

Thank you to the sponsor of this episode: Aeroflow Breastpumps. They are making the process of getting a breast pump a little bit easier—actually, a lot easier! Head to www.aeroflowbreastpumps.com/startup to have them help you qualify for a free breast pump through insurance.

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